Thursday, March 12, 2009

Feeling alone surrounded by others

Well the retreat is now behind us and we are back to our everyday routines. I don't know about you but I loved everything about the retreat: the speakers, the fellowship, the food, the hot tubs, my roommates, the small groups, the times of prayer and the beautiful and peaceful grounds of the conference center. Upon reentry home, I looked forward to reviewing my notes, checking my prayer pocket and especially contemplating the words on my mask. (For those of you who were unable to be with us on Sunday morning, Traci gave each of us a paper plate mask. On one side we wrote words to describe how we saw ourselves---warts and all. On the other side we wrote words to describe how God sees us. We shared these in our small groups and we helped each other find more words to describe how God saw us.) But alas, in the midst of stripping beds, carrying suitcases and loading cars I misplaced my notebook, prayer pocket and mask. So I have had to use my menopausal memory to recapture all the I gleaned from our weekend away. I confess one memory that continues to haunt me is a word that more than one woman put on the "how we see ourselves" side of the mask. It was the word ALONE or LONELY!
Isn't it amazing that on the outside we can be surrounded by people, even people we know and love, and on the inside we feel all alone? Three times, in my 30 years of walking with the Lord, I have experienced seasons of loneliness. Each time I have called out to the Lord for friends. The first time, I needed Christian friends. The second time, I needed a community of friends. While, the third and longest season I was crying out for a "kindred spirit" kind of friend. The Lord eventually answered each of those prayers. However, the most important lesson I learned through those long and lonely seasons was that Jesus is my always friend!
How about you? Are you alone or feeling lonely? It is my heartfelt prayer for the Lord to meet you wherever you may be in your alone place. I pray above all that He will reveal to you His desire to be your ever present and forever friend, that He will provide you with true and faithful friendships and that you will know that you are never alone!

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